I was nearly staring at her andour eyes met and I received one of those wonderfulsmiles that I so enjoyed. The train pulled up, I got inand took my se...t. Much to my surprise she sat downbeside me. I looked over at her and she smiled andsaid, “hi.” I returned the greeting. She leaned overclose to my ear and whispered, “read this.” I looked down and she was holding out a hand-writtennote for me to take. Her hands were delicate, but herfingers were long and the nails. And so any woman who has a conscience must question her own ethics in playing out her fantasies, but in other ways the primal nature of fear and excitement, its very irrationality, shifts sexuality into a different kind of existence from morality as a set of choices and commitments. And so how does one respond?I respond by embracing the fear, embracing the fetish for black men as dangerous sexual beings. I want to be taken by a black man. I want to suck his member. And hopefully I do it well. He pulled my arm back behind me and twisted me around. I felt my head go forward; next thing that I knew he had me bent forward over the hood of his police car. I felt him standing there behind me. I struggled, crying. "Please," I cried, "don't DO this to me!"I felt him trying for my other hand, but I avoided him. "Please," I cried, "just let me TALK to you..."I felt my free arm strike his hand, and he pulled up my other arm, until I felt pain shooting through my shoulder."Please," I cried,. Both had got dressed up for the occasion."You women make such a fuss over stuff like this," he said over thenewspaper."Kelly is finally free to be the woman she wants to be," said Miriam."And I'm not missing out on a rare day of pampering either." Bye dad. Last time you see me as a girl. I'll be returning as a youngwoman," said Kelly.With that, they left Mark and headed of to town.Paula left at roughly the same time, with Laura and Joanne. Laura hadbooked appointments for 3 girls at the salon..
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